Grace And My Father's Birthday

Today's my father's Birthday. He would have been 20. They count better in Heaven than they do here.


Once a month, I'm allowed to help lead worship at my church. It's an honor for a lot of reasons, and I'm confident it's also what I should be doing. God has given Jen and me the pipes to sing, a heart for worship, and I have a pedigree for it. My dad taught me all I know about theology, and my brother went to Seminary. And now I have a nephew in the Sem. It's the family business.


For those of you who knew my Dad, perhaps his greatest ministerial gift was teaching. Any one of his confirmands could conjure up the heart he'd draw on the chalkboard to represent God, breaking down the most complex concepts into simple images.


So, a few weeks ago I submitted the songs to be sung for that week's worship. I learned that the text was going to be about the Transfiguration, and after a lot of searching around, I found myself cornered. I really wanted to sing "Show Me Your Glory" by Third Day, but that would cause some work for us as a group. It would end up being a special music song, and that was something we had already decided on.


So Jen and I began searching for music that focused on revelation, seeing, opening our eyes. Jen began searching through versions of music, listening to types of songs and she stumbled across this video (I'd embed it but YouTube forbids it for this particular video.)


It was very different, but it solved a different dilemma we were encountering - no drummer - and it was just quirky and different and repetitive enough to work. Plus, it included a bit of eschatology in it with the inclusion of "I'll Fly Away." Might be fun. I submitted the service and set about prepping the group to do it.


A few days later, I received an email telling me the lyrics to that song were not appropriate for worship, because it implies that we choose to let Christ in.

I wandered so aimless

Life filled with sin

I wouldn't let my dear Savior in

Then Jesus came

Like a stranger in the night

Praise the Lord I saw the light

CHORUS:

I saw the light

I saw the light

No more in darkness

No more in night

Now I'm so happy

No sorrow in sight

Praise the Lord

I saw the light

Just like a blind man

I wandered along

Worries and fears

I claimed for my own

Then like the blind man

That God gave back his sight

Praise the Lord I saw the light

CHORUS (2x)

Some bright morning when this life is over

I’ll fly away

To a place on God’s celestial shore

I’ll fly away

I’ll fly away, oh glory

I’ll fly away.

When I die, hallelujah by and by

I’ll fly away

I’ll fly away

CHORUS

hmm. I pulled the song, but I did let them know the author clearly chooses nothing but sin and to walk away from the cross. I quote scripture and Luther and made my case. I was disappointed it was dealt with that way.

It's an image my Dad drew for us over and over. Of a cross with a sinner facing away from it. The only direction the sinner would walk, Dad would draw, is away from the cross. He would never turn around.

I wandered along

Worries and fears

I claimed for my own

 "The natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God; for they are foolishness unto him; nor can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned. " 1 Corinthians 2:14

"The carnal mind is enmity against God." Romans 8:7

It isn't, Dad would draw/teach, until the Holy Spirit turns that person around that they can actually even see the cross. See the light.

So, yeah, I took and still do take it personally. My Dad taught me well. I know the difference. I'm glad I have his drawings of His love on my heart, and understand grace and Lutheran theology.

Well, That Worked

I left this domain to go start a new blogging experience at Batiansila.com. It didn't go well. I wrote probably one meaningful post, and then lost every post I'd written on the new domain.

In the meantime, a year and a half has transpired since anything has been written here. It might be time to get this going again.

Braelyn Vogues

This weekend marks a confluence of crazy events: this is the Sunday closest to Dad's birthday, so for years, we've gone home to go sing in Church. In the old days, that meant practicing a half hour before Church and then sprinting across the parking lot driveway to the balcony at St. Paul's, making eye contact with Jean Doell that we were indeed going to sing something, and then waiting until Dad would look up from reading in the lectern to see that his children were standing at the ready to sing.

It has always sounded good, though, without fail. Always. And now, the only thing that's the same is the people singing - and even they aren't the same. We're all obscenely old - older than our parents were when we started considering them old. We plan on singing at Mom's church, shepherded by the Sainted-By-Christa Pete Speckhard. And...we have no idea when we'll practice or what we're singing. Ok, so not everything is different.

At the same time, my Isabel has returned to Wisconsin. Izzi was down in Fayetteville, NC with her husband, Andrew and it turns out he's almost done with this three year enlistment. Instead of completely leaving the Army, Andrew was able to find a very appealing job (by that, we mean "a position that likely exists only because the armed forces are a huge bureaucracy and didn't realize they probably don't need the position) in the reserves, and figures that's the route God has for him.

Oh, and by the way - BT Dubbers - Izzi's daughter Braelyn came home. Braelyn is six months old, super alert, beautiful, and is the little girl I've missed holding for a few years. Braelyn spent a good amount of time yesterday trying to determine who Teia is and why she looks like her mom and if indeed Teia is her mom.

AND, Heidi and Phil will be home. It's the first time I've seen Phil since we were all praying for him last year....and the last time we'll see their family before they adopt their little girl, Anna.

Anna Will Soon Call Minnesota "Home."

I won't let the fact that Anna and Braelyn - Anna being Braelyn's aunt - will play together for a good part of their lives blow my mind. I won't. I won't.

I won't.