Is angry. Upset at herself because she saw this coming. Talked to nurses who didn't respond. Waited too long, she says.
She's upset with the professionals who said let's wait. When she asked for attention, she was told to wait until rounds at 9. At 815, she pressed and kept pressing and finally it wasn't until Physician's Assistant came up to see how Zoe was doing that things really started moving.
Of course as a parent, you'd try to own this. We also just feel like we have to reeducate, reask questions each shift change. We hate feeling like zealots, those parents who are pressing. But here we sit with all these emotions.
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for me, as a nurse and a parent, there is NO shame in being an advocate for your child. hoping jen has peace with it all soon. praying for everyone involved, especially sweet zoe.
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kelly
You and Jen are the only ones who CAN PRESS for little Zoe on her behalf. You are not zealots, you are Gods advocates for your precious girl. Praying for your hearts and Jen please don't feel at fault. You are doing the best any worried mom can do. He is holding all 3 of you.
ReplyDeleteIt is He who gives you strength.
Love, Laurie in Ca.
Thank God you are there and persisted as you did. I know that feeling so well of not wanting to make noise but needing to advocate as you did.
ReplyDeleteThere is no benefit in looking back, only forward. I have prayed to my little Annie to watch out for Zoe. You are the greatest parents and so many people are praying for Zoe and her medical team.
It is the best we can all do.
Barb
My 14-year-old, Jonathan, has been memorizing this for tomorrow. I thought I'd share it.
ReplyDeleteHymn of Trust
Oliver Wendell Holmes
O LOVE Divine, that stooped to share
Our sharpest pang, our bitterest tear,
On Thee we cast each earth-born care,
We smile at pain while Thou art near!
Though long the weary we tread,
And sorrow crown each lingering year,
No path we shun, no darkness dread,
Our hearts still whispering, Thou art near!
When drooping pleasure turns to grief,
And trembling faith is changed to fear,
The murmuring wind, the quivering leaf,
Shall softly tell us, Thou art near!
On Thee we fling our burdening woe,
O Love Divine, forever dear,
Content to suffer while we know,
Living and dying, Thou art near!
We are holding you near and dear in prayer. We just want to hug you all and encourage you. As we prayed for Zoe this morning at church, we handed this great heart-burden to the Lord. It is too big for us. We are crying to the Lord with you. the Hunts
please please.. allow jen to be angry.. she is the advocate. and that is her job.. there is no lie in "mommy knows best" she is allowed to have the emotions.. i just wish sometimes too the docs. would listen to parents a little closer sometimes..
ReplyDeletePraying today for all of you. Jen, especially that God will be a tangible comfort and reassurance to you that you are the mommy He chose for Zoe. You didn't fail; you are in a terrible situation, so hard.
ReplyDeleteDear Father, we know you can heal when no professional dares to speak words of hope. Please heal Zoe now. Please let her rest, free from pain during this period of intubation, as she is sedated right now. And You speak hope into Zoe's parents' ears.
Jen, please forgive me for offering advice at a time like this, but please ask them (if you don't already know the answer) how Zoe will now be fed. She is healing from surgery and fighting an infection, so more than ever needs good nutrition, not just IV fluids. They can do TPN (IV nutrition) if inserting a tube to feed her isn't a possibility. That way she gets readily-available nutrients right into her bloodstream. When my daughter was hospitalized this year, it's something it took a nurse to point out after a wk had passed with minimal or no intake. Sometimes it's easy to miss the forest for the trees.
We will be continually in prayer for Zoe and both of you.
love, connie
I want to encourage you not to second guess past decisions you've made. I am asking God for peace for all of you and, of course, healing. I am asking for wisdom for the medical staff and you as Zoe's parents. I am praying!
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